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Review: Why Not Me? by Mindy Kaling

Saturday, November 26
My rating:

3 Stars… and 1/2

What I loved:

In Why Not Me?, Kaling shares her ongoing journey to find contentment and excitement in her adult life, whether it's falling in love at work, seeking new friendships in lonely places, attempting to be the first person in history to lose weight without any behavior modification whatsoever, or most important, believing that you have a place in Hollywood when you're constantly reminded that no one looks like you.
In "How to Look Spectacular: A Starlet's Confessions", Kaling gives her tongue-in-cheek secrets for surefire on-camera beauty, ("Your natural hair color may be appropriate for your skin tone, but this isn't the land of appropriate-this is Hollywood, baby. Out here, a dark-skinned woman s traditional hair color is honey blonde.") "Player" tells the story of Kaling being seduced and dumped by a female friend in L.A. ("I had been replaced by a younger model. And now they had matching bangs.") In "Unlikely Leading Lady", she muses on America's fixation with the weight of actresses, ("Most women we see onscreen are either so thin that they're walking clavicles or so huge that their only scenes involve them breaking furniture.") And in "Soup Snakes", Kaling spills some secrets on her relationship with her ex-boyfriend and close friend, B.J. Novak ("I will freely admit: my relationship with B.J. Novak is weird as hell.")
Mindy turns the anxieties, the glamour, and the celebrations of her second coming-of-age into a laugh-out-loud funny collection of essays that anyone who's ever been at a turning point in their life or career can relate to. And those who've never been at a turning point can skip to the parts where she talks about meeting Bradley Cooper.

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What I loved:
You know - if I hadn't read this on the back of what turned out to be one of my favourite memoirs of all time, I think I'd have rated it a 5.
Mindy Kaling is funny as shit, and I liked her warts-n-all approach to this book. It was fun to read, and entertaining, and insightful. I also really loved getting an insider look at her career. That was super fun.

What I didn’t love:
Nope - great book! I just timed it wrong, so I think I was constantly wishing I was reading the one before it.

Overall…
The part about Carson Daly cracked me up.

Quote…He seems to have this impossible schedule and still manages to be a funny and down-to-earth guy. Which means he is either a rare and wonderful person, or he is twins who live on opposite coasts and have committed their lives to this low-stakes and marvelous hoax.
I like either explanation.

Review: King (King #1) by T.M. Frazier

Saturday, November 19
My rating:

4 Stars…

What I loved:
Homeless. Hungry. Desperate.

Doe has no memories of who she is or where she comes from.

A notorious career criminal just released from prison, King is someone you don’t want to cross unless you’re prepared to pay him back in blood, sweat, pu$$y or a combination of all three.

King’s future hangs in the balance. Doe’s is written in her past. When they come crashing together, they will have to learn that sometimes in order to hold on, you have to first let go.


Warning: This book contains graphic violence, consensual and nonconsensual sex, drug use, abuse, and other taboo subjects and adult subject matter. Although originally slated to be a standalone, KING is now a two part series.

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What I loved:
There was a lot to love here. The twists, the turns, the tension, the drama, the angst, the violence, the manipulation. The not-always-totally-consensual-like smut.
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But there was also a lot of humour in there with the grit factor. I liked little things about our heroine early on.
Quote…"Where was he?"
"State."
"College?"
"Prison."
Prison made much more sense than college.

She was trying to take care of herself, but she was obviously a sweet girl, deep down, before her memory was wiped, and parts of that kept creeping out and I really felt for her. I really loved the way she made promises to herself... or to the herself she was before she lost her memory.
Quote…I'll try harder, I promise. I can survive...for you.


♥♥And I loved everydamnthing about Preppy♥♥ Best character I've read in ages. He's the character I've loved most in 2016, and he's not even the hero. Even if you don't love the book... and there are some stupid parts, Preppy's letter is worth staying for.

What I didn’t love:
I'm not a fan of cliffhanger endings. This one is all about the cliffhanger, so I'm glad I'm reading it 2 years after it's release.

Head games. Like, King is a bit of a tool, and he does this thing in his office before he sleeps with Doe. Literally, right before he goes down to the dock and bangs her against the side of the house.
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Overall…
A dark, twisted, emotional journey, and even with the cliffhanger ending and a few reveals you can see coming from a mile away, I thought it was a pretty good read. Definitely going to read the next book at some point.

Quote…He whispered how much he loved being inside me. How much he wished he wasn't so much of an asshole. How I deserved the world. How he wasn't good enough for me.
And then it hit me like a fucking freight train with no brakes, and my heart seized in my chest.
King was saying goodbye.

Review: Bounty (Colorado Mountain #7) by Kristen Ashley

Tuesday, November 15
My rating:

1 Stars…... but at least I finished it.

What I loved:
Justice Lonesome has enjoyed a life of bounty.

Even so, she’s inherited the curse of the Lonesome. A poet’s soul. Which means she’s still searching for something. Searching for peace. Searching for the less…that’s more.

And when the foundation of her life is pulled out from under her, grieving, she goes to the mountains to find her oasis. She hits Carnal, Colorado and decides to stay.

Deke Hightower lost everything at the age of two. He lost it again at fifteen. His life has not been about bounty. It’s been about learning to live with less, because there’s no way to get more.

Deke’s also watched all his friends go down to the women who gave them what they needed. He wants that for himself. But he knows that search isn’t going to be easy because he’s a rider. His home is the road. That’s the only place he can breathe. And the woman who takes her place at his side has to do it sitting on the back of his bike.

When Deke meets Justice, he knows she’s not that woman. She’s cute. She’s sweet. And she’s into him, but she’s got it all and Deke knows he won’t fit into that. So he holds her at arm’s length. Establishes boundaries. And Justice will take it because she wants Deke any way he’ll let her have him.

But when Justice finds herself a pawn in a dangerous game, Deke makes a decision.

When he does, he has no idea he’s just opened himself up to bounty.

Sounds good in theory, right?

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I've been searching for a KA gem, like Creed, Deacon, Walk through Fire... books that stay in my top 20 reads no matter how many books come after them. This isn't that.

Because this:

Quote…Yeah, I felt the bleed.
I sipped my Jack and Coke and then did the only thing I knew how to do to staunch the flow when it all got too much.


Seriously, I thought we were discussing periods. We weren't... we were talking about feelings.

And this...

Quote…He might have won it but I got the last laugh because I liked that movie too so I didn't mind losing (and I knew before I even suggested it (something I didn't hesitate to do anyway) that I wouldn't get Deke to watch Ben Stiller's version of The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, or at least not without more energy for the flight and some buildup of bargaining power).


That's one sentence. One sentence with parentheses inside more parentheses. At this point I thought KA was actually taking the piss out of her readers, by accepting money for this book. Or that it was a prank I wasn't in on. Further research tells me it's not.

And this...

Quote…My stomach sank, and not for the first time I cursed the poet's soul my father gave to me because this didn't feel like that guy who you were attracted to not being attracted to you.


And this...

Quote…"Honestly, with that brother of yours the way he was, I would have considered entering the mindfuck that was trying to get his head straight about two seconds before he made his bed and jumped in. Another fourteen million to keep me flush until I died, that brother of yours, no skin off my nose."


Fucking what???

And this...

Quote…"Thing that's sure was what freaked your girl Lacey's old man, Anton Rojas, when you knew him, had a very illegal business."


... all add up to this...
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As much as I'm looking for my next KA masterpiece, I can't continue to spend money on books that by any standard, aren't even in fucking English.

Review: Taking What's Mine by Alexa Riley

Friday, November 11
My rating:
4 Stars…

What I loved:

Alone at night in the middle of nowhere. The town sheriff pulls me over. I should be safe.

I'm not.

Nothing could have prepared me for what he had planned. And my darkest desires should have remained a secret. But it seems he knows everything about me.

I'm his now, and only I will do.

Warning: This book contains situations involving forced submission and dubious consent. The hero is obsessed beyond control. Nothing can stop him from the only woman he'll ever have. These themes are triggers for some but sweet candy for others. If you're willing to hold off judgement until the last page the ending is worth it, I promise.

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What I loved:
If you can suspend reality, and put aside your judgements for a little bit, this is some smutty, twisted goodness. I liked that Ms (Misses?) Riley always has quirky warnings in her synopses, and this one is no different.

Quote…If you're willing to hold off judgement until the last page the ending is worth it, I promise.

This is insta-obsession, crossing all the lines, not-ok goodness, and it gets many thumbs up from me.

What I didn’t love:
Personally, the word cum makes me cringe. But I know to be prepared for that when I get my grubby little hands on Alexa Riley's books, so I'm good with it.

Overall…
Quote…"...Feel how my big dick stretches you as I rape this pussy, and yet you still cream yourself for it."

Well, ok then.

Review: Emails from an Asshole by John Lindsay

Tuesday, November 8
My rating:
1 Stars…


Synopsis:
When John Lindsay launched DontEvenReply.com in June 2009, it became an instant sensation. With 60% of the book featuring entirely new material never before available on the website, Emails from an Asshole offers fans a fresh opportunity to revel in people's gullibility. Posing as a customer or seller, Lindsay responded to a variety of classified ads, making ridiculous offers to unsuspecting victims. Their responses, and the ensuing conversations, will have readers simultaneously laughing non-stop and gasping with disbelief.

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What I loved:
- The title was the whole reason I bought this book, really. As someone who has spent the larger part of 10 years looking at companies' email chains, it appealed to me.
- A couple of the conversations were hilarious.
- My teenaged nephew thought this whole book was funny as shit.

What I didn’t love:
- This is just trolling. Like, you can read any comment thread on YouTube, a celeb twitter account, reddit, eBay... any forum, and see this kind of stuff. 99% of the time, it's not funny - it's just some angry dude sitting in his parents' basement being a dickhead. 'Real People Being Stupid' is totally misleading... 'One Guy Being a C$$t' would be more accurate.
- Ok, is it just me being oversensitive or is this book racist as fuck?

Overall…
Pass. Didn't make it to 60%

Top 3: That's Not OK Heroes

Tuesday, November 1

My three That's Not OK heroes are dominating alphas that cross the invisible line into the super uncomfortable, and totally underage, zone. Like, in real life, you would press charges on their asses... but we won't, because fictional and sexy. All these stories are 4 and 5 star reads for me, by authors I love, and with a storyline that keeps me going back for more.

When it comes to your heroes, if you prefer the dirty dirty with a bit of a twist - these guys are for you.

Ladies & Gentlemen, I give you my not-at-all-acceptable beasts...

Deuce West
Undeniable (Undeniable #1) by Madeline Sheehan



What line does he cross? She's the teenaged daughter of a MC prez. He's an up and comer in a rival club. He watches her grow up, and then corners her in a stairwell. It all goes downhill from there.
Are you sure it's ok? Not at all. It's just plain wrong, but this story is a top rated hit on GR, Amazon, B&N, Kobo and my local Whitcoulls. It also contains abuse, cheating (yes, between the main characters) and my favourite part - Deuce getting shot. A cult classic, and I'm featuring it just for that. Everyone reads Undeniable at some point. Sort of like Lolita.


Felix 'Mercy' Lécuyer
Fearless (Dartmoor #1) by Lauren Gilley
 


What line does he cross? He is her bodyguard, godfather, and protector. Then, he's her lover. And boy, does he pay for it.
Are you sure it's ok? It's weird. It's not right. But I'd still class it as a romance because Mercy is the bomb. He was protective, he loved her, and the story was so good it more than made up for Mercy being a cradle snatcher. Like, in a fictional world. I mean, in the real world he'd be in jail.

Grizz
Nine Minutes (Nine Minutes #1) by Beth Flynn


What line does he cross? I'm not gonna lie - it's fucked up. He kidnaps a minor, keeps her at a biker compound, and it's not even accidental. If nothing else, read the prologue...
Are you sure it's ok?Again - no. But, her parents weren't much better, the prologue is to die for, and the story is one of very few that had me reading the series in order and all the way to the end.

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